04 May 2012

Guess what...

He said, "Nice to meet you" and handed me the bread and went on.

I go home in 12 days. 12. Less than two weeks. I have a paper to turn in Monday, and an exam Wednesday and tomorrow I'm throwing a Kentucky Derby Party.

I admit. I'm conflicted. Seriously - I'm torn up inside.

I've been on the European continent since August 31, 2011. I've been in Ireland since January 17. I've lived in Italy, spent 8 days stranded on a Greek island, been to Auschwitz and Krakow, spent 8 days in Barcelona, 20 days on a farm in Valencia, and kissed the Blarney Stone twice. I'm headed to London and Paris. It's been amazing.

And I don't want to leave. I really don't.

But I do.

I want to hug my mom and my stepmom and my stepsister and all of my friends. I want to visit my dad's grave.

But there are so many challenges at home.

To that end I would like to announce that I shall be ending this blog in the week I return home. But the proverbial journey isn't over. Robert Frost said,

"I can sum up in three words everything I've learned about life - it goes on"

And that is so true. These amazing adventures I've had that I've gotten to share aren't going to end just because I'm back in the States and dealing with "life". I've been dealing with it these past nine-ish months and I've learned that for anything to matter you have to be present. 

That's my challenge, staying present. Not allowing myself to just zone out for days at a time. Sure, the occasional Downton Abbey or Pride and Prejudice or Transformers marathon. But not for days at a time and preferably with friends.

I want to continue this journey with you all, and I hope with more people. So, I'll be starting a new blog. It doesn't have a name yet, but it does have a purpose - to continue all the growing I've done. To live consciously. Eat healthy. Love yourself, but not selfishly.

I would like to share something else with you. I just read it, and it's very well put. It's what they don't tell you about grief.


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